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Fatwa Answer

Question ID: 1398 Category: Rights
Difference between informing and taking permission from husband

Assalaamalekum wrwb

i Leave in Plano,Tx.

recently I had a issue with my husband regarding taking permission to go to my parents house.

a day before going I mentioned him saying "Iam planing to takes kids to my parents house tomorrow"later my husband asked what time I'll be leaving and by what time I'll be home..

next day I went to my parents house from where we planned to go out for dinner,I again texted my husband and informed him that we are planning to go out for dinner if he is free he can join us. He was busy and dint reply to my text so I waited for an hour and I called him and mentioned him about the dinner plan and also asked if he wants to come along.. 

next day we had an argument on something and he bought this topic and said that I have not taken the permission from him before going to parents house and also to restaurant.

my question is 

informing the husband that where Iam going is not equal to taking permission.where I feel that if husband doesn't want me to go then He can stop me.

بسم اللہ الرحمن الرحیم

:الجواب وباللہ التوفیق

Just information alone does not fall into the category of permission, however, if the relationship and the husband's mood is such that the information is sufficient, it will be considered permission. But when the husband complains despite the notification that you have not taken permission, then the husband's explicit permission will be required to leave the house.

The second thing is that the relationship between husband and wife is more on moral footing than the law to live a life of harmony. Therefore, both spouses should allow concessions for each other and the habit to let go of small things.

The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: “The best of you is the one who is kind to his family (wife), and I am the best among you to my family".

In another narration:

وروي عن ابن عباس رضي الله عنهما أن امرأة من خثعم أتت رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم، فقالت: يا رسول الله! أخبرني ما حق الزوج على الزوجة؟؛ فإني امرأة أيم فإن استطعت وإلا جلست أيماً! قال: فإن حق الزوج على زوجته إن سألها نفسها وهي على ظهر قتب أن لا تمنعه نفسها، ومن حق الزوج على الزوجة أن لاتصوم تطوعاً إلا بإذنه فإن فعلت جاعت وعطشت و لايقبل منها، و لاتخرج من بيتها إلا بإذنه فإن فعلت لعنتها ملائكة السماء وملائكة الرحمة وملائكة العذاب حتى ترجع، قالت: لا جرم و لا أتزوج أبداً". رواه الطبراني".(الترغيب والترهيب للمنذري:۳؍۳۷

According to Fatawa Shami:

و لیس لها أن تخرج بلا إذنه أصلًا" (ردالمحتار علی الدرالمختار: ۳؍۱۴۶

فقط واللہ اعلم بالصواب