Salams, I am 25 years old. I have been dealing with anxiety and depression majority of my life. I have overcome self-harm and anorexia in my teenage years. But in just the past two years, I had a rough patch and gained a little over 100 pounds. As a result, my health obviously declined drastically. What makes matters worse is that I struggle with lipodema, PCOS, and Hasimotos hypothyroidism. Most days, it's almost impossible to get out of bed. I have chronic pain now in my joints, mainly my knees which makes it difficult to exercise (sometimes, even to walk) and that aides my depression. I know it sounds like excuses but I feel like I tried everything. A few months ago a friend told me how she used edible marijuana to cope with her issues from her doctor and introduced me to it. I tried it and felt great results. I was able to move without pain which helped me exercise and it also boosted my mood. The doses I take never interfere with my life or my prayer, I am able to function normally, socially as well. I do not have a prescription for this because it's taboo in my family so I can't get it directly from a doctor. Recently, I read somewhere that weed is the same as alcohol in Islam. My question is, is this true? Is me taking edible marijuana to self-meditate the same as drinking and is thus prescribed the same punishment (40 days no accepted prayer)? Or is it just a sin? Or is it acceptable, in my case? Which of the three? Thank you.