I don't know where to start but with hope of positive outcome me and my wife of 6 5 months have been fighting alot and she has a very bad temper, when ever she has a bad temper she ask for divorce but when she is calm she appolgizes. we have been fighting since last few days she has been asking for divorce and I told her I don't wanna give her divorce but she was still mad at something not related to me (cheating or drinking or hitting her i.e.) so I left and stayed with my brother she was still mad trying to ask me to leave my brother otherwise give me divorce and I keep telling her that I don;t wanna divorce you. Same day I went to my house (where me and my wife reside) we got into an argument again I was angry and I said three times with in 10 sec that I divorce you, after that my wife realize that she never wanted divorce she was just trying to prove her point and off course I never wanted to give her divorce and we wanna see if our divorce is valid because she didn't want divorce and I didn't wanna leave her and still don't want our marrige to end. Please advice asap and keep it confidential, there are many school of thoughts regarding this matter we wanna do the right thing. get back to me asap. I live in California and we are Sunni muslim. Thank you very much..
الجواب وبالله التوفيق
In order for Talaq to take place by the use of word ‘Talaq’, an accompanying intention is not required. It is mentioned in Tirmadhi:
ثلاث جدھن جد وھزلھن جد النکاح والطلاق والرجعۃ(ترمذی حدیث1184
Translation: There is no distinction between intentional and non-intentional action in three things i.e. Nikah, Talaq and Reconciliation.
In the situation described in your questionthree Divorces have taken place and the husband and wife are not allowed to reconcile without performing a ‘Shar‘ai Halalah’.Also, it is not permissible to perform a new Nikah with the same husband without performing a Shar’ai Halalah. Allah (SWT) says in the Holy Quran:
ٱلطَّلَـٰقُ مَرَّتَانِۖ فَإِمۡسَاكُۢ بِمَعۡرُوفٍ أَوۡ تَسۡرِيحُۢ بِإِحۡسَـٰنٍ۬ۗ وَلَا يَحِلُّ لَکُمْ أَن تَأۡخُذُواْ مِمَّآ ءَاتَيۡتُمُوهُنَّ شَيۡـًٔا إِلَّآ أَن يَخَافَآ أَلَّا يُقِيمَا حُدُودَ ٱللَّهِۖ فَإِنۡ خِفۡتُمۡ أَلَّا يُقِيمَا حُدُودَ ٱللَّهِ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيۡہِمَا فِيمَا ٱفۡتَدَتۡ بِهِۦۗ تِلۡكَ حُدُودُ ٱللَّهِ فَلَا تَعۡتَدُوهَاۚ وَمَن يَتَعَدَّ حُدُودَ ٱللَّهِ فَأُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ هُمُ ٱلظَّـٰلِمُونَ (٢٢٩) فَإِن طَلَّقَهَا فَلَا تَحِلُّ لَهُ ۥمِنۢ بَعۡدُ حَتَّىٰ تَنكِحَ زَوۡجًا غَيۡرَهُ ۥۗ
did not allow Nikahؐ It has also been mentioned in the books of Hadith such as Sahih Bukhari,that Rasulullahwith the same husband without Halalah.
عَنِ ابْنِ شِهَابٍ، قَالَ: أَخْبَرَنِي عُرْوَةُ بْنُ الزُّبَيْرِ، أَنَّ عَائِشَةَ، أَخْبَرَتْهُ: أَنَّ امْرَأَةَ رِفَاعَةَ القُرَظِيِّ جَاءَتْ إِلَى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ، فَقَالَتْ: يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ، إِنَّ رِفَاعَةَ طَلَّقَنِي فَبَتَّ طَلاَقِي، وَإِنِّي نَكَحْتُ بَعْدَهُ عَبْدَ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنَ الزَّبِيرِ القُرَظِيَّ، وَإِنَّمَا مَعَهُ مِثْلُ الهُدْبَةِ، قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ:"لَعَلَّكِ تُرِيدِينَ أَنْ تَرْجِعِي إِلَى رِفَاعَةَ؟لاَ، حَتَّى يَذُوقَ عُسَيْلَتَكِ وَتَذُوقِي عُسَيْلَتَهُ"(صحیح البخاری حدیث5260