My question is that if a husband is planning to go for a hajj leaving his wife back with two kids does he need to ask his wife first about his plans? My husband is planning to go for hajj this year and he did not told me anything about this. I got to know from someone else and when i asked him his reply was "do i need to tell u specially" I had told him long time before that inshallah whenever u will make plan to go for hajj i will also go. Now is has done all his booking for this year taking with him his sister and her daughter. After completing the hajj he will be going to India and his sister will come back to US with her daughter. This has hurt me a lot and is affecting our relationship a lot. Please let me know if he can do this?
Your prompt response will be greatly appreciated.
الجواب وبالله التوفيق
For fulfilling the Fardh(obligatory)Hajj, a husband as well as the wife does not need to ask each other, since it is an obligation on every Muslim man and woman. However it is against a Muslim’s moral code of conduct and common decency that one does not inform their spouse, instead the spouse hears it from someone else. Also, while the husband is going for Hajj and it has become an obligation on his wife to perform Hajj as well, then it is advisable and preferable that the two go together (as a Mehram might not be available for the wife at a later time). Else, if the husband is going alone, he should make sure that he has sufficed for food, shelter and other daily expenses of his wife and kids.
قال اللہ تعالی: وَلِلّٰهِ عَلَى النَّاسِ حِجُّ الۡبَيۡتِ مَنِ اسۡتَطَاعَ اِلَيۡهِ سَبِيۡلًا ؕ
It has also been mentioned in the books of Islamic Fiqh(Jurisprudence) that:
لان الشرط فی وجوب الحج زاد وراحلۃ و نفقہ اھلہ فی ذھابہ و عودہ(بحوالہ الحاوی الکبیر فتاویٰ محمودیہ ص۳۰۱ ج ۱۰)