Thursday | 30 November 2023 | 16 Jamadiul-Awal 1445
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Fatwa Answer

Question ID: 1830 Category: Marriage and Divorce
Husband has forsaken me and will not grant me talaq

Salam Alaikum, 

I was recently married in January of this year. After moving in together I found out my husband was having emotional relationships with other women and including underage girls. He is also a drug trafficker and along with the mental abuse of him telling me he did not want me, I asked him for permission to let me move back into my home with my father. A week after leaving, my husband was angry during an argument and said "You are talaq". This was in a moment of anger and also close to a time he had sexual relations with me so his talaq was not valid. After giving him time to calm down he unblocked me on social media because he won't unblock my phone number. I explained to him that I can not afford to ask for khula because of my living situation. So therefore I asked him to write to me in a proper way and give me talaq. He refuses and completely ignores me. Our marriage is beyond repair and I have no desire to stay married to a kafir. I can not trust his family and I have no way to get in touch with them to talk to him for me. The sheikh who married us was in hajj for Ramadan and I was told after Eid he will get in touch with me and he has not. I have many proofs of my husband's mistreatment of me and I am mentally breaking down. I can not move on with my life in a halal way without him giving me talaq. Can someone please help me?

بسم اللہ الرحمٰن الرحیم

:الجواب ومنہ الصواب

When the word “divorce” comes out of the husband's mouth for his wife, divorce takes place whether it is said in a normal state of mind or in a state of anger. In your case, one divorce has already taken place upon you. 

Since your husband divorced you after the intercourse, as stated, then if your husband  reconciles with you within your waiting period “Iddah”, your marriage will remain intact.  But later in your married life, the husband will have the option of only two divorces. After subjecting you to those two divorces, the wedlock will immediately terminate with irrevocable divorce.

The method of reconciliation after a single divorce is for the husband:

a. to verbally say that I have reconciled with my wife.

b. or to caress his wife.

c. or lovingly kiss his wife. 

Additionally, it is better to have witnesses on this decision for record purposes. 

If the husband does not reconcile during “Iddah”, then after completion of the “Iddah” period, the wife will be excluded from his marriage, and will be allowed to marry wherever she wants. 

We suggest that you approach a “Dar al-Qadhaa” in your area for a solution to this problem. 

ھکذا فی فتاویٰ محمودیہ بحوا لات کثیرۃ منھا ویقع طلاق من غضب... قلت وللحافظ ابن القیم الحنبلی رسالۃ فی طلاق الغضبان قال فیھا انہ علی ثلثہ اقسام احل ھا ان یحصل لہ مبادی الغضب بحیث لا یتغیر عقلہ ویعلم ما یقول ویقصدہ وھذا   اشکال فیہ -(فتاویٰ شامی کتاب الطلاق)

فقط واللہ اعلم بالصواب